Karma Chameleon

I'm a shapeshifter. A chameleon.

My friend noticed me looking at a reflection of his monitor today. I was checking out his screen, seeing what he was up to. I've been doing that for a while, just a quick glance at the reflection, see what's going on. Today; busted.

So I was thinking about that, my stealing glances at his monitor. I wondered to myself why I did that. For some people it might be just curiosity. As for myself, I think there's a few other ingredients mixed in there. At first I figured it's because I'm a chameleon, checking out what my colleague is doing and do that; if he's working, then I should work, if he slacks off, I slack off. A karma chameleon, changing my mood and personality according to the mood and characteristics of the people around me. I've been a karma chameleon for as long as I can remember. Even my friends notice that I can be different people around different crowds. They've even said to me "We don't know you. We don't really know who you are. Who are you?". I don't know really. Maybe I'm just being myself, but we all know that's like saying a cat is being feline; that's what it's supposed to be.

Thing is, as I'm writing this thing, I start to wonder, is that really the reason why I was doing it? Because I'm trying to assess the overall atmosphere and adapt my lazy ass to it? I suppose that might be part of the reason, since that is after all human nature, or at least that's what this doctor thinks.

I think I care too much about what people will think about me, about whether they may see my actions as fit or acceptable. I care too much that people should accept me into their lives that I forget to live mine. Or do I? Abrupt end.